Frank the Tank gets Fancy

Ordinarily I can't stand overly stylized semi-nudes. They're a little too dear for me.  Artsy NYU girls can hang poster versions in their dorm rooms, but ordinarily I think thats about the only use for them I approve of. But my eye lingered on this one for a while.  Then I realized it was Frank the Tank, one of my favorite bodybuilders.

Trent Reed

Trent reed is another example of an incredibly handsome man who cannot take a decent photograph. As I scan through the photo set I hear the echos of a photographer saying:

 "Close your mouth...chin up...close your mouth...close your mouth..."

Although maybe they thought his slack jawed vapid pose was sexy...who can say? Art direction in porn was not what it is today when these pics were taken. Thank god we've progressed as a society to a place where porn is well lit and well sound edited. Our strides in porn production values since the early 90's are more impressive to me than air conditioning, antibiotics and the collapse of communism put together. God bless America.

Anyhoo despite his lukewarm presence in stills, I loved him on film. He's tall and muscley and kinda dumb looking in a "gas station attendant" kinda way, which is what I go for. Plus he dated Jake Andrews and porn couples warm the cockles of my heart

He has a great cum shot in "Billy's Tale" which I've posted here (watch how his chest turns red when he blows...so hot). And who could ever forget the donut blow job from The Road to Hopeful? A true classic.

Mixing up porn stars with Scum Bag Mag

Have you ever wondered what would happen if you could put Colby Keller's head on Heath Jordan's torso with Johnny Hazzard's feet? Or Heath's head on Johnny's bod? Of course you have!  Well if you're like me you stay up all night pondering things like this. If that's the case, Scum Bag is for you. I attended an event for the re-launch of Scumbag at one of my favorite bars this week, not knowing what it was. Imagine my delight when I realized it wasn't just an art magazine, it was a flip book of naked men with bonafide porn stars mixed in with local flava. Its a triptych mix-and-match thingy so you can "create your perfect man". There are faces too--if you look below you can see that Heath+Johnny+Colby facially combined apparently equals Brett Favre. 

There are tons of hot guys in there, mostly "real men" but definitely hot stuff. I'm trying for once to use my copyright infringement for good instead of evil so if you want to see the rest you should order a copy and support the pornographic arts.

Mystery man indentified: Tony Stefano

Thanks to reader Matthew for identifying mystery man Tony Stefano. The stills are from "The pizza boy, he delivers" with Lee Mann doing the sucking. Anyone else need out there needs someone identified, let me know.

Who's that boy?

A reader sent in this photo asking for identification of the man getting head. From the style I'd say Falcon 90's but thats all I got. He looks kind of like Filippo Romano but the era is wrong. I've got close to 100% success with porn star Identification so dont let me down, internet pervs. Double points if you can identify both men.

Porn star sighting: Francois Sagat

With Francois Sagat there are two camps with a clear demarcation between them: those that can get past the tattoo and those that can't. I'm afraid I fall into the latter category. I'm not being a hater--he's a beautiful man, but I find the tattoo just too goofy and distracting to totally objectify him in the ways I would like to. That being said, theres a lot a do like about the guy. His body is amazing--particularly the rear view. I also love the bizarre projects he gets involved with--from LA zombie to the experimental photo shoots he always winds up in. I like a man who doesn't take himself too seriously.

Anyhow I saw him last week at the gym, which is bit of a surprise because I don't believe he lives in New York. He was a bit shorter than I would have guessed, but he looked damn good. Well, minus the scalp tattoo at least. He looked too serious to ask him for a photo, so I chickened out, which doesnt make for a great story I know. 

The funniest thing about that day was that as I was leaving the gym I saw a Fedex guy lifting boxes who was probably 6'4", and at least 250 pound of solid muscle. He had these gorgeous bicep tattoos and this head of wavy black hair. Truly a stunning specimen. That is why living in New York is so awesome--you can see a sweaty porn star working out, then 5 minutes later see someone even better just walking down the street.

FRANCOIS SAGAT BY ELVIS DI FAZIO from elvisdifazio on Vimeo.